Is this thing we call love…The other day my daughter asked me how she would know, or better yet how I knew when “he” -her daddy- was the one, and how would she know? She was genuinely puzzled, despite the fact she is only turning 9 next week, (though I’ve heard some stories that a few kids have boyfriends at the age of 5 (!?!) I ‘calmly’ popped the question “Do you have a boyfriend sweety?”-please say No, I thought to myself.
“No Mom it is just that I see you guys and I want to be prepared.” In that I believe, she is the most concerned kid I’ve ever seen, always telling her friends not to jump there, not to run over there, “I don’t think it is a good idea” she says.
“So what did you say”, my co-worker asked me when I mentioned it later on once at work. “Well it is hard to say” I for once did kiss a lot of frogs, though I know some of them were the princes at the wrong time in my life, what made me the “frog” for them per say, I knew that was not the most appropriate answer to have given her.
“Well darling you talk a lot and see you have a lot in common, then you start going on a few dates with the him, dinner, dancing, movies, a game, and you like to hang out, you will see.
But most of all you have to feel good when you are with him, and not down, or angry, or mad, or fighting all the time. And when you are without him, you should be fine too, not super scared about what he is doing, this is not love. That is passion and you are going to live through that too, we all do, I wish I had a magical power so you my little one would not, but it is part of life. And we will be there to see you through. And you will find another person. And try again. That is how you find out, but you have so much yet to come before that lots of playdates, sleepovers all those other fun things.”- she was pretty satisfied with that.
You know how mothers are, I could be wrong as well. She might find it another way. I hope I can be there for her, like my Mom was for me, many times, sometimes not even saying a word, just touching my forehead, or cheeks, or calling the guy on the phone to know what happened. Yeah, I’ve been through it all.
Because I am a true believer I went down the deepest side of my own, some therapies, some lots of crystal work and meditation, lots of dancing with friends to wash away the grief or only to flirt and have some fun. This is how I finally found out that love should bring you peace at heart and push us to be the best we can possibly be, then I married the man who made me feel this way, and I try to make him feel the same in return. I found what I was looking for in this terms.
I am fully aware that everyone has their own journey to find what they yearn for and should give it a try. It honestly pays off. All the tears, anxiety excruciating pain they all pay off, when you let the guards down when you are willing to compromise and learn from your mistakes.
Funny little thing. Such a small word in most languages I guess, and the biggest, most daring hunt of every single one of us. Dearest than the most exquisite gem, is the heart in love, accomplished and fulfilled.
go for it, or celebrate yours,