A bit of myself · Experiences of a Brazilian in Canada · Facts of the world · Happy Valentine's Day! · life style · love · love is worth it · love talk · loving · Personal matters

50 shades of Grey, yes me too

Yes me too,

I went to see the movie today with 3 more friends/ladies 2 of them moms like me, what makes us falls into the book’s category of mom porn which bothered me for several reasons, first I had to go around the fact that I would force myself to find a 27-30 year old guy attractive, being over 40 it never occurred to me, mainly because I tend to find men who are at least old enough not to be almost my kids attractive.

It also bothered me because I am for our rights, I like when my husband opens the car door for me -yep he still does that for almost 20 years- I also like when he does the driving, the wine picking, but that’s pretty much it, never turned on to spanking or any of that. I am surely not into pain and pleasure, but I don’t judge others, who am I to?
So people think I was into that because I both read the Trilogy and went to see the movie? Isn’t that obvious? I read the book series which was lent to me, I got curious and got carried away so the first book lead to the second that had to finish on the third. Then there was the movie let’s go see what they have done to it.

Did I like it?

Neh, too shallow, so you take a book that is not well written-I know I know- but yet captivates millions of women (mainly over 40 like me) and make it even a worse movie? Of course that was more to it than BD&SM, though the movie did not exploit that either, it introduced to it, I think, and did it not show how she was caught in the web of pure seduction, fetishism, fanaticism that is in ‘devoting to a person’s body’. A good illustration to it is this talented musician Sam Smith he goes and writes this song “Stay with me”, nice and all but next sentence he goes like “you are all I need”, cool, but in real life I would run fast and far, this guy would stick to you like a maniac, crazy glue and all, he would call and manipulate you 24/7. This is what it is all about.

Anyway the feeling I had was that they torn the whole book threw the pages into the air and the ones they picked -by chance- were the scenes they decided to write the script out.

Yeah, enough said, it won’t change my mind, as I heard a guy on an interview saying “this book will change your wife”. My life should be pretty empty for that to happen.  I might crochet something based on one of the books, I don’t know yet maybe the cover of the book or something, not a whip though for sure.

What I liked about the book is the complexity of character and the innocent girl thinking she could ‘rescue’ him, she kind of did, because it is fiction and ‘love’ prevailed, and the way he worships her all through the trilogy. Some of us women have tried to love and save the bad guy we were once with, and we all know what happens. We can’t. We just don’t have this power.

Bottom line is I come back home, after a nice time out with my friends, to my dear beloved hard to have found husband, lover, and friend who unquestionably showed me 50-whole- colors of love and being loved-not only shades.

You take care,


be good to yourself · kids love and us · love · love is worth it · love talk · loving

Funny Little thing- Love talk- Valentine’s Week!

Us, though she was only 6 back in this picture

Is this thing we call love…The other day my daughter asked me how she would know, or better yet how I knew when “he” -her daddy- was the one, and how would she know? She was genuinely puzzled, despite the fact she is only turning 9 next week, (though I’ve heard some stories that a few kids have boyfriends at the age of 5 (!?!) I ‘calmly’ popped the question “Do you have a boyfriend sweety?”-please say No, I thought to myself.

“No Mom it is just that I see you guys and I want to be prepared.” In that I believe, she is the most concerned kid I’ve ever seen, always telling her friends not to jump there, not to run over there, “I don’t think it is a good idea” she says.

“So what did you say”, my co-worker asked me when I mentioned it later on once at work. “Well it is hard to say” I for once did kiss a lot of frogs, though I know some of them were the princes at the wrong time in my life, what made me the “frog” for them per say, I knew that was not the most appropriate answer to have given her.

“Well darling you talk a lot and see you have a lot in common, then you start going on a few dates with the him, dinner, dancing, movies, a game, and you like to hang out, you will see.
But most of all you have to feel good when you are with him, and not down, or angry, or mad, or fighting all the time. And when you are without him, you should be fine too, not super scared about what he is doing, this is not love. That is passion and you are going to live through that too, we all do, I wish I had a magical power so you my little one would not, but it is part of life. And we will be there to see you through. And you will find another person. And try again. That is how you find out, but you have so much yet to come before that lots of playdates, sleepovers all those other fun things.”- she  was pretty satisfied with that.

You know how mothers are, I could be wrong as well. She might find it another way. I hope I can be there for her,  like my Mom was for me, many times, sometimes not even saying a word, just touching my forehead, or cheeks, or calling the guy on the phone to know what happened. Yeah, I’ve been through it all.

Because I am a true believer I went down the deepest side of my own, some therapies, some lots of crystal work and meditation, lots of dancing with friends to wash away the grief or only to flirt and have some fun. This is how I finally found out that love should bring you peace at heart and push us to be the best we can possibly be, then I married the man who made me feel this way, and I try to make him feel the same in return. I found what I was looking for in this terms.
I am fully aware that everyone has their own journey to find what they yearn for and should give it a try. It honestly pays off. All the tears, anxiety excruciating pain they all pay off, when you let the guards down when you are willing to compromise and learn from your mistakes.

Funny little thing. Such a small word in most languages I guess, and the biggest, most daring  hunt of every single one of us. Dearest than the most exquisite gem, is the heart in love, accomplished and fulfilled.

go for it, or celebrate yours,